"Focus Up!"

Yesterday was a great day making cards with my daughter, Brook, and my sister, Stephanie.  We spent the afternoon "being creative" as we laughingly teased each other and "militantly" (Brook's word, not mine . . .) crafted thank-you and birthday cards.  At one point in the chatting, Brook mentioned that her dogs had learned the "focus up" command.  When she wants them to pay attention, she tells this command to the jumping, wagging, tongue-lolling hounds, and surprisingly, they've learned to settle and focus.  (I think it's her no-nonsense voice that gets their attention, but that's somebody else's blog about dog training!)  That comment made me think of how focused I am this week; I even have a "master plan!"

As I finish up my major yard projects, I'm starting to get a little lackadaisical about my days.  I believe that after 2 weeks of solid, back-straining, physical labor, I should just let down, you know, kick back.  Saturday afternoon found me in just such a state, and I realized there's no kicking back just yet; there are "miles to go before I sleep."  That's OK with me; I'm not one to laze about for long periods of time.  I always have this sense that time is passing, and I'm not using it to its fullest intent.  Oh, I'm not the gung-ho, hit-it-every-minute-you're-awake sort (I have watched a season of Fringe, countless movies, and read 2 books this summer so far . . .), but getting to the end of the week without accomplishing anything is sure to create crazy in me. So Sunday while Corey was at his morning meeting I created a master plan for the week.  It included finishing the last 2 projects, weeding regularly, making cards, and sewing.  Oh!  And the reason for the picture shown:  GET BACK ON THE MAT!  Since school got out for the summer, I have only sporadically done Yoga, and my inability to sleep comfortably, to move without effort, and to focus/control my brain (thoughts) show it.

Yoga has become my one enduring activity.  It creates focus and balance in all areas of my life:  physical, mental, and spiritual.  As I slowly moved through my totally-abbreviated-because-I-was-forcing-every-pose routine, I realized I had become too judgmental of my practice.  Because I was stiff and out of sync with myself, I focused on the discomfort and lack of desire to be on the mat.  Only when I repeated the mantra "Do not judge.  Accept."  did I allow myself to focus on the breath and flow of the routine.  The last half of the practice went much more smoothly as a result, giving me the rejuvenation I've come to crave from my practice.  I didn't do any balance poses; I know I've been out of balance for almost 6 weeks.  Balance poses require strength, for sure, but they also require a quiet place in the soul to allow the strength to flow to all areas equally.  I KNEW that wasn't going to happen.  I've been possessed by the need to study for and pass the Praxis test, to define and build the new flower bed area, to weed, move, and divide old flower beds.  In short, I have been what Corey calls, "In frenzy mode." I haven't spent much time (Hah!  OK, NO time) meditating, reading scriptures, or even doing Yoga for restoration.  As I did my practice again today, the aversion was overcome a little sooner in the practice.  I still didn't do any balance poses, but I know I'm on my way back from the edge.  My master plan includes fun things as well as projects, and Yoga is back in the plan to keep me honest with myself about what I should focus on to create balance in my life.